So we've been waiting for a while to hear about Casey's fellowship. We had thought that we would know something in mid-November, which would make a great announcement at the Thanksgiving table if Casey was offered the position. But Thanksgiving came and went. We had a lot to be thankful for, but a job for Casey wasn't one of them.
Then December and the annual Christmas card. This year we planned to include a letter with our card, intending to announce the location of Casey's job next year. So we waited. I had everything ready to mail out the Christmas cards, we were just waiting to print out the letters in case we needed to change the information about Casey's job search. So we waited some more. Then it was only a week before Christmas and I knew we had to get those cards out. We mailed the Christmas cards on Monday.
So of course, on Tuesday we get the call. Casey was offered the fellowship position at Charlotte (Carolinas Medical Center) - our first choice. He accepted. So we'll be moving to Charlotte, probably in June (depending on when we sell our home.) We're very excited!
I guess the best things come to those who wait.
So, for Christmas Casey wants an Xbox 360. For those of you wondering what an Xbox is, it's a video game system. I mention this because I didn't know what it was until Casey started talking about as a Christmas gift idea. Even though my brother has one and I remember he thought it was a big deal when he got it, I still wouldn't have been able to identify it as Xbox 360. To me, they're all the same: some video game thingy.
Video games. Our mothers didn't warn us about video games when we got married. They might have warned us about constant sports on television, dirty clothes on the floor, belching, home improvement projects that never seem to get finished, etc. But they didn't tell us about the all time-consuming video games. It's a new phenomenon to my generation, something our mothers didn't have to deal with.
Men love these machines. Their wives hate them. Men can spend hours upon hours upon hours playing these games. Even though we don't currently have a game system, Casey has a few games that he plays on the computer, so I know how he can get lured into gaming. (For several years, he's accepted his computer-only system, even though "all this friends have a system" and he's "the only one in his residency that doesn't have a system" -- my goodness, it's like I have a whiny kid) He's excessive and obsessive when he's going through a video game phase, but he could be worse. He still gets work done around the house before starting a game. And he's quite adept at playing some games with one hand - because the other arm is holding a baby. (Maybe some of Coulson's sleep problems originate from the hours he slept next to the noise of a video game as an infant...) But every free moment of his time is spent playing video games. Then after a few months, he is finally satisfied and stops playing completely. Until the next video game phase starts up...
And us women? We despise these machines. They are our competition. Forget the young, pretty women at their workplace. It's the video game system that we really need to wary of. But here's the irony: it's often the women who buy these machine for their husbands. Two of my friends have given video game systems to their husbands as gifts, one as a wedding present! And guess what -- Casey will probably get one for Christmas. What is wrong with me? I can't help it -- I love my husband.
And I like Simpson's Road Rage.
Today more than 6,000 children will lose a parent to AIDS. December 1 is World AIDS Day. Take a few minutes to learn about this pandemic. I'm sure there's a bunch of information on the internet about AIDS, but if you want somewhere to start, try World Vision. They have a quick test you can take to let you know about the staggering statistics of AIDS in the developing world.
On being thankful:
"I am thankful for a good God that loves me, and toothbrushes and toy rocketships." (dictated to his preschool teacher for a Thanksgiving craft.)
Driving to my brother's house on Thanksgiving Day, we Casey and I were talking about what we were thankful for. Several months ago a Newsweek article brought me to tears with the realization of how much I take my safety for granted. It was an article about bombing in Palestine with a picture of a two year old. In America, the parenting magazines warn us of a two-year-old's irrational fears such as monsters in the closet (or in Coulson's case - robots) etc. As parents, our job is to reassure the child that he is safe and that his parents have created a safe environment for him. So I was thinking of the parents in these war torn areas who aren't able to reassure their toddlers that they are safe and can't protect them from seemingly random bombings when I told Casey, "I'm thankful for safety."
Coulson broke my deep emotional thought: "Fire Safety?"
"Yes, Coulson. Fire Safety."
On Sin and Salvation:
"Why Jesus die?"
"Because sometimes we do things that make God sad."
"Why because things make God sad?"
"Well, God is all good, and you need to be all good to be with God. But we're not all good. Sometimes Mommy does things that make God sad. And sometimes Daddy does things that make God sad. And sometimes Coulson does things that make God sad. Do you do things that make God sad?"
"Yes." (quietly)
"Jesus was all good, but he died because we are not always good, so we can talk to God. Does this make sense?
"Yes, It makes sense."
"Okay." (although by this point, I myself am confused.)
"But why God make Jesus die?"
Repeat explanation above.
"Why God and Jesus?"
How do you explain the meaning of life to a two-year-old? The parenting experts say to keep explanations short, but he keeps asking "Why?"
On Marriage:
"I like your ring, Mommy. I want a ring like yours."
"Daddy gave it to me. Did you know that Daddy has a ring like mine? I gave it to him."
"I want a ring."
"Someday when you grow up and there is someone special that you love very very much - someone not in your family (because we love our family very very much) maybe you'll exchange rings with that person."
"Maybe Noah, because he's not in our family."
Oh, that's a conversation for another day...
From The ONE Campaign, Oxfam's Fast for a World Harvest:
If 20 people sit down at your table, representing the world’s population:
3 would be served a gourmet, multi-course meal, while sitting at decorated table and a cushioned chair.
5 would eat rice and beans with a fork and sit on a simple cushion
12 would wait in line to receive a small portion of rice that they would eat with their hands while sitting on the floor.
The true power of an Oxfam Hunger Banquet is that as you eat your meal, unlike the real world, you see what’s on everyone else’s plate.
Take a moment to fully realize how much we have been given compared to the rest of the world. Sometimes I get caught up in my own little world, comparing myself to others around me and feeling so deprived on our meager resident's salary. Especially here in America, it's so easy to forget about the rest of the world. I'm taking time this Thanksgiving not only to be thankful for all the blessings I've been given, but also to pray for those around the world living without even a fraction of the blessings I take for granted. I'll probably donate to some of my favorite relief organizations: the Mennonite Central Committee and World Vision. If you're interested in helping eradicate world poverty (OK, who isn't?) check out ONE: The campaign to make poverty history. Its purpose it to raise awareness about global poverty and influence political leaders to take real action. A diverse group of organizations have partnered with the campaign from liberal to conservative, religious to secular. And if you join the mailing list, you just may get some emails from surprising people -- I just got an email from Matt Damon (and I think I've gotten emails from George Clooney and Brad Pitt in the past.)
It's already here. I've heard commercials on the radio and seen them on TV. I've received flyers in the mail. I've seen festive yard and home decorations in the stores. I've even seen a house all decked out with lights. The jolly red icon of the season has already made an appearance at our local mall. Yes, the Christmas season is upon us!
Most people dread this early onslaught of the holiday season. I saw one person sadly shake his head as he observed, "Christmas starts right after Halloween these days." Gone are the days when Christmas started the day after Thanksgiving. It's just a marketing scam to extend the shopping season and thus increase the profits.
But our home welcomes the longer season. Casey and I used to break out the Christmas music before Thanksgiving, but we would hide the CDs from any visitors because it was such a taboo thing to do. Like wearing white shoes after Labor Day. But it's a whole new world now. We can listen to our music proudly and loudly. I could even unpack some of our decorations and buy and wrap gifts. I could read books about the Christmas story to Coulson. We are very excited about this new freedom to start celebrating the greatest holiday in November. Critics might feel that this early attention to Christmas robs Thanksgiving of its well deserved attention. I feel the opposite however. Thanksgiving is all about showing our gratitude to God for the good things He has given us. Joyfully celebrating Christ's birth is a great way to show our gratitude and the longer we celebrate, the better.
Of course we'll probably be so busy with kids and work and everything else that we'll forget to celebrate early.
I failed. I planned on taking lots of cute pictures of the boys for Halloween, but when the time came, I just didn't make it a priority. I was busy with everything else and Coulson's not really into cooperating for posed pictures, so I knew it would be a hassle getting the two of them together. But I did get a few pictures a couple days before when Coulson was going to a party. Sadly, I didn't take one single picture of Charlie in his pumpkin outfit - not a costume, just an orange outfit with pumpkins that says "Little Pumpkin." I suppose I can just dress him in it again and take a picture and pretend I took it on Halloween...
Coulson was originally going to be a fireman. We bought a costume that had a coat, hat and plastic fire extinguisher. The fire extinguisher could actually squirt water, but I never told Coulson that. He had enough fun just walking around the house and pretending to put out fires without needing water. Anyway, the coat was soooooo huge and Coulson refused to wear the hat, so I made a last minute call to my sister-in-law to borrow Tigger. This is Tigger's third Halloween appearance. He was proudly worn by Brinton last year and by Lauren the year before that. I don't think Charlie will be ready for it next year, but perhaps Tigger will show up again in 2008.
And Coulson is doing a great job sharing. The first time I asked him if he would share, he said no. So I said that I would take away all his candy if he didn't share and he immediately and happily replied "OK, I'll share my candy." So now whenever he gets a piece of candy, he also gets a piece of candy for whoever else is around. I'm trying hard not to influence what he decides to give me and he's nice and usually gives me good stuff. Last night he gave me M&Ms, which are his favorites. He probably just hasn't learned that you're supposed to give away the stuff you don't like. He's so sweet like that.
The following is from a brochure about "In Your Honor," a project through New Directions International.
As this Thanksgiving season quickly approaches, you and your family might take a moment to discuss what you are thankful for. Have you ever been to a Christian seminar, conference or retreat? Did you enjoy comfortable surroundings? Perhaps you had a nice chair to sit in or a relaxing bed to sleep on. Today in Kumasi, Ghana in West Africa, there is a conference center being built that will provide training for pastors and lay leaders. The conference center was formerly a rural farm. Hopefully, in the future new
buildings will be renovated including one for women. Presently, the "women's dormitory" is a farm building that was cleaned out for their retreat.
"As I was going to the farm building, I was shocked to see many women sleeping on the floor with nothing to lie on or to protect them. When asked about the poor conditions, they explained that they just did not have funds for the women to have mattresses, mosquito netting or provisions for cleaning or resting. I was so touched that they would sleep in conditions like this just to be where they could be spiritually refreshed!" -- Mimi Mucher, guest speaker at the conference center.
There is an immediate need for seventy-two sets of supplies to improve the conference facilities. Each set is $65 and consists of the following: a foam mattress, mattress cover, sheets, pillow, pillowcase, blanket, mosquito netting, towel and washcloth. Would you consider making a donation as part of your Thanksgiving gift to the Lord as a family? "In Your Honor" is a way for your family to honor another by donating a set or more of supplies for the conference center in Ghana. In giving, you can honor a person or family who has been special to you. The person or family you choose to honor will recieve a card in the mail letting them know of the gift given in their name and thanking them for their impact and love to your family.
If your family would like to give while honoring another, please email me with your name and address and I can send you the brochure.
I was out of commission as a parent to Coulson for a couple weeks after having Charlie.
I was there for hugs and kisses, but most of his care was given over to his father and grandmothers. Now that I've been back as primary caregiver, I've noticed a few changes. He now knows about lollipops, candy and dessert, wants to drink chocolate milk, recognizes Barney and a bunch of other PBS characters, insists on having the tags cut out of his shirts and can identify those ubiquitous golden arches as "Old McDonald's restaurant." (Well, this last one is actually my fault - they have really good sweet tea.) He also started preschool recently and has picked up some great new activities from his friends there, such as spitting and shoving.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not blaming his dad or grandparents or preschool - their help was (and is) a God-send to help me recover and bond with Charlie. And it's helped me grow-up as a parent. I used to be able to control everything in Coulson's world and limit what he was exposed to. But that's not my job as a parent. My job is to prepare him to interact with the real world appropriately and with purpose. Now I get to teach him about moderation, self-control, choices and priorities.
And it hasn't all been bad things he's learned. He says please and thank you more. He told me that Moses "opened the waters" and asks a lot of questions about how God made everything. ("Did God make the cars? Did God make the plane fly?"). He offers to share his favorite foods with me sometimes.
As he gets older, I'll be able to control less and less of his world. I can only pray and trust God that I'm building a good foundation for him so he can confidently interact with the real world in a way that will bring glory to God and love to others around him.
It will be interesting to see how "moderation" and "self-control" play out with Halloween candynext week. I'm hoping he really gets into sharing with others!
Today we went to the pumpkin patch to pick out pumpkins. Coulson immediately picked out one that was "his size" and helped Daddy and Mommy pick out ones their size. You can click on a picture to see it larger. And yes, I dressed them in orange on purpose. I'm one of those moms who likes to dress her kids alike. It's just so cute!
